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A giving person

Have you ever thought about “happiness”?

For the past two or three days,

I am confused with the concept of happiness.

I’ve written before that it is important to think about your happiness first.

But the more I think about what makes me happy, the more confused I get.

For the most of my life, I’ve felt happy when I can do something for somebody else and make him/her happy.

But lately, I feel sad or down because I’ve felt under-appreciated.

And it’s really stupid because I always tell people , “oh don’t worry! I am not doing this to ask you to give something back to me.”

Why would I say that if I expect to be appreciated by people for what I’ve done for them?

I’ve realized that it’s REALLY difficult to think about only MY happiness.

It seems like it’s impossible for me to think about and seek for what makes ME happy.

When I think about things, well let’s say, when I think too much about things,

I often end up thinking like… “well, this person is better off without me.”

Why is that?

But still… I am a giving person… I guess I can’t help it.

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